Start Seeing Diversity
One time I witnessed a coworker silence a child because they
pointed out that a man had long hair and said he looked like a woman. The adult
told the child to be quiet and not to be “rude” about other people’s
appearances.
Two messages could have been communicated to this child by
the adult’s response. The first message would be that children are not able to
express their thoughts freely or ask questions as they learn about others. When
the child expressed their observation, they were making a connection with
something they are familiar with. They are most likely used to seeing women
with this feature, and men with shorter hair. Their statement did not have a negative
connotation and was more objective, but the adult took it offensively.
The second message that may have been communicated is that
the child’s comment is shameful, and therefore associates the subject of the
comment with shame. For example, if the child had said, “I like that man’s
hair” the adult may have praised the child for using kind words. However, the
child simply made an observation about the man’s hair and said it looks like a
woman’s, which automatically was shut down, therefore insinuating that long
hair on a man is “different” and not something that should be commented on.
As an anti-bias educator, this type of situation could have
been a teachable moment for the child and may have started a conversation. For
example, if the child had said the statement to me, I would have said, “Yes,
his hair is long and women typically have long hair, but that does not mean
that men cannot have it too!” This could then begin a conversation about
noticing differences without subjectivity. Specifically, this topic, regarding
hair, may be easier to discuss than differently abled individuals, races, people with severe
birth defects, or unknown languages. Starting at this baseline (diverse hair) could
establish future conversations about more challenging topics. I could also incorporate books in the classroom that include these different types of diversity in order to encourage children to explore and ask questions (Hall, 2008). As adults, we
have to be careful about how we approach these types of conversations. The way
we respond can set the tone and establish unwanted messages or pave the way for
further bias.
Hall, K. W. (2008). Reflecting on our read-aloud practices: The importance of including culturally authentic literature.YC: Young Children, 63(1), 80–86.
Reference
Hall, K. W. (2008). Reflecting on our read-aloud practices: The importance of including culturally authentic literature.YC: Young Children, 63(1), 80–86.
Tara,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your experience. I feel that many adults need to stop being embarrassed and dismissive when children point out differences and need to understand it is a natural part of their development. By being embarrassed and dismissive, we are denying children their need to make sense of the world and creating pre-prejudice (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010, p. 14). As anti-bias educators, we are often given the task to dispel the biases children have learned at home or through the various types of media. After this week, I can see how important it is to continue to build my library to include more inclusive books.
Trish
Derman Sparks, L. & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.
Hello Tara,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about your co-worker should have allowed the children to express their observation, and then educated the child on not only do girls, and women have long hair, but boys and men can have it too. Sometimes as adults we get nervous or embarrassed on what children say, but how are children ever going to learn about life or the society they live in if we just shhhh them . Education is the key to teaching our children about diversity, and begins with role modeling and communication in my opinion. Thanks for sharing!
Tara,
ReplyDeleteThis is a really great example that is an observation as you said. Typically these comments are made because a child is observing something in society and they have questions about it. Just this week, there was a young boys shirt laying in the hallway of the school and a student said thats not mine its a boys shirt. I pointed out that girls can wear boys shirts and vice versa. My student said "wait really?!". I went out to explain yes, this is possible and fine and then another students shared that in her house her sister had on something of her brothers. Once these examples were shared my students had a better understanding. Conversations can be very meaningful.
Thank you for sharing!
Brianna
Tara,
ReplyDeleteExcellent post on identifying how you can make that moment a teachable moment. Many people often forget that it is okay to "correct it" and make it a learning moment. Derman-Sparks (2010, p. 80) quptes that if we want children to thrive in a diverse world and to choose to stand up for themselves and others we need to create a more just place for all, then we must be proactive and respect the attitudes towards peopel of different identities. We will continue to have these moments and the more we identifty these moments the the less of a bias these children will have!
Thanks!
Krissy Reeves
Work Cited:
Anti-bias Education For Young Children and Ourselves
I too hushed my child because she made a comment about someone's appearance, not thinking that it could relay to her that she shouldn't express her thoughts freely. However, I wonder where to draw the line between allowing children to express themselves and teaching them the importance of being inclusive and respectful of the feelings of others. I believe this is a difficult conversation across the board! It's important to find the delicate balance. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDelete