Observing Communication

I was unable to conduct a formal observation in a child care setting so I decided to observe at my grocery store. This week, while I was at the grocery store, I observed a parent and young child communicating with each other. The child was at first just sitting in the cart playing on a phone, but then the dad asked the child if they wanted a specific type of cereal. The child was consumed by whatever was on the phone and didn’t respond to the dad. The dad then said, “Hey buddy, can you put the phone down for a second? Let’s focus on this right now” as he pointed to the cereal. The child said “Oh, sorry” and put the phone down as he started to look at the cereals. I was impressed by this interaction, even though it was short because the dad did not raise his voice or get frustrated with the child. The dad merely repeated his phrase calmly and asked the child to redirect their attention. They seemed to have a trusting, nurturing relationship because of how they treated each other with respect and patience.

As the child continued to look at the cereals, he told his dad he wasn’t sure what he wanted because they all looked good. The dad said, “Ok well let’s narrow it down to two of your favorites and then we’ll flip a coin.” I thought this was really neat because the dad offered a suggestion to the child that would help expedite the process while avoiding an argument about cereals. The child was able to narrow it down to two kinds of cereal and then the dad pulled a quarter from his wallet and it landed tails, which was Cocoa Puffs! ☺

In this specific situation, there was not a controversial topic that needed to be reviewed with a persona doll, but there was an encounter between an adult and a child that was respectful and effective. I have seen similar situations between adults and children where the adults get agitated quickly and take the phone from the child, which cause an upset. In this situation, the dad came up with the solution to the problem however, he could have posed his question in a way that encouraged the child to come up with a solution (Stephenson, 2009). For example, he could have said “That’s a tough decision. What do you think we can do to narrow down the choices?” This would put the problem solving back in the child’s hands, and encouraged him to think of a way to solve it.

I think the communication interactions I observed provided the child with a sense of self-worth because the dad treated the child with respect. Demonstrating respect establishes a foundation for children to value themselves and value others. Children are more patient, happy, and successful when they feel respected and can, therefore, treat others the same way (Taylor, 2010). While the situation I observed provided the child with a sense of self-worth, I also believe that if the child had been able to think of a solution, it would have provided a stronger sense of self-worth. As Stephenson (2009) expressed, offering children to think of a solution lets them analyze the problem from their perspective, and therefore creates positive self-identity.

Watching this interaction at the grocery store helped me to reflect on how I interact with my students. Often I find that the stress of my job and other factors can become overwhelming, and in turn, my patience runs thin. I try to be patient and stay positive, but there are times where I know I could be better at this. To be an effective communicator and educator, I want to show my students respect by demonstrating patience and put the power in their hands by allowing them “to initiate conversations” (Rainer Dangei & Durden, 2010, p. 78).

References

Rainer Dangei, J., & Durden, T. R. (2010). The nature of teacher talk during small group activities. YC: Young Children, 65(1), 74-81.

Stephenson, A. (2009). Conversations with a 2-year-old. YC: Young Children, 64(2), 90-95.

Taylor, J. (2010). Parenting: Respect starts at home. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-power-prime/201001/parenting-respect-starts-home